Pokémon and park benches

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By Katy Leonard

I believe in Pokémon and park benches. Everyone wishes they could relive one moment in their past, one moment that they love so much- a moment they cherish. Moments like these happen in the blink of an eye and then they are gone. A moment that I relive again and again is anchored in Pokémon and a park bench. Even though it is a child’s game, I never played Pokémon as a child, but rather was introduced to it by a friend when I was a junior in high school. We would hang out and talk about all kinds of things, Pokémon was only one of them. The moment I relive again and again is a summer day on a bench in Tawawa Park, talking with my friend about both random and important things: work and Pokémon and our hopes for senior year. It was a beautiful July afternoon with sunshine and possibilities. I left the park with my friend, filled with gratitude. That was the last day I saw him.

He unexpectedly passed away shortly after. He was one of my best friends since my freshman year. In many ways he saved me because we would spend hours talking and never run out of things to say. He helped me figure out who I was in the world. When I found out that he was gone I was devastated. I had to learn to live with the fact that I would never talk to him again and that all I have left are the memories. His passing was shocking and I am still experiencing the many ways that his loss continues to shape me. I spent months watching other people my age go on with typical teenage experiences: going out, laughing at silly jokes, meeting for dinner. I felt like I was watching it all from the other side of a screen. I could not bring myself to participate.

There are so many times I wished I could go back to that July day in Tawawa Park. I wish I could go back in time to play a child’s game. That wishing has taught me to cherish these moments while they are happening. Cherish life. Not everyone gets the opportunity to keep living and loving. In time, I realized that this is one of the many ways that his passing has shaped me. I have made a fierce commitment to live in the moment. While I will never forget my friend, I have accepted that I can’t live in the past, because if I do, I will miss the present. Grief has already robbed me of many moments this year, but now I realize that I need to live all of the plans we made for my senior year when we were sitting on that park bench last July. Author Roy T. Bennett reminds us that, “If you want to be happy, do not dwell in the past, do not worry about the future, focus on living fully in the present.” We can never go back, but we can make new memories. I believe in Pokémon and park benches. I believe in cherishing the past, but living in the present.

Katy Leonard is a senior at Sidney High School. She is the daughter of Kelly and Bob Leonard. She has lived in Sidney her whole life. After she graduates she plans to study psychology with a goal of someday becoming a Neuropsychologist. She is looking forward to going on her senior trip this summer and making new memories.

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