Dear Grandparenting: I am going to give you a different kind of grandparent to write about. You might call me the grandmother who is on strike and very off duty.
Guess I have better things than my grandchildren to think about — like me! And guess what? I don’t have one ounce of guilt. It sure beats me how people find grandchildren so incredibly fascinating.
It doesn’t really matter what age they are. Infants do nothing more than eat, sleep and excrete. Toddlers break things and wander off. Adolescents are selfish. Teenagers are trouble with a capital T. And the whole bunch is just too noisy. Case closed.
Maybe I’ll change my mind when my grandchildren are older, or maybe not. I have taken good care of myself. I’m on the go. There are gentlemen who find me attractive. I’ll take that over a grandchild with a bad diaper anytime. Maybe I’ll send the kids a postcard next time I get to Hawaii. Already Gone, The Villages, Florida
Dear Gone: Sorry to disappoint you if we’re not in shock over another grandparent who can’t be bothered.
We know you’re out there. Grandmother is among the most commonly modified nouns in the English language — Gran, Granny and Grandma, etc. Now add “Glam-ma” to the list, slang for glamorous types who figure they’re much too cute to be called grandmothers.
Who can count the reasons grandparents elect to jump ship or minimize their role, or how they go about it? Some embark on personal journeys. Others like you seek romance, or may have stepfamily issues.
Some are estranged from grandkids they find annoying, spoiled or entitled. Others worry the grandkids will become too dependent on them, or simply don’t want to slip into a caretaker role. Who’s going to care for me, they wonder?
We believe grandparenting is high on the list of life’s great rewards. But to each their own. Who’s to say they won’t eventually come around? Better late than never.
Grand remark of the week
Lucky Lady from Waynesboro, Pennsylvania reports “life doesn’t get better than when my grandkids scream out my name and run over to hug. No topping that!”
Dee and Tom, married more than 50 years, have eight grandchildren. Together with Key, they welcome questions, suggestions and Grand Remarks of the Week. Send to P.O. Box 27454, Towson, MD, 21285. Call 410-963-4426.