It was recently brought to my attention female humans can sell their eggs.

I’m not using mine, so I thought, oh I could do that. I don’t really plan on having kids and it’d be nice to help out someone who can’t; but also there is a bit of green exchanged in the transaction.

So I started to do research and learned I am too heavy to be accepted to any of the programs in the area. Apparently my body mass index (BMI) is in the “overweight” category. So now I have to decide what would make me more happy – my care-free lifestyle or money and doing good for others.

I have always thought of myself as a big lady, but I was taught at a young age there are many standards of beauty, not just the one that is shown in the media. My weight hasn’t stopped people from finding me attractive. More importantly, it hasn’t stopped me from finding myself attractive. It never stopped me from being a cheerleader for 10 years, or finding clothes that fit me. I have always loved myself and had a lot of self-confidence.

Sure, I wouldn’t mind slimming down my double chin, or having my tummy jiggle a little less, but there are more important things in my life than getting up and running three miles everyday or eating green things.

That’s not to say I’m not active and don’t eat things that are good for me. I love bananas and assorted berries. I consume a lot of milk, and I love to dance and hike. I rarely drink soda, and probably drink my weight in water everyday.

I love spending time with my family and out in nature. I enjoy drinking, playing card games and being silly with my friends. I like concerts and walking barefoot. Spending my money on travel sounds way more fun than on a gym membership.

Is losing 20 to 30 pounds so I can make $7,000 worth it? Is giving up ice cream, vats of pasta, and laying on the couch doing nothing some days worth it?

With the $7,000 I could pay off one entire student loan, and a little hunk of the other one. But cheesy potatoes with bacon exists. Would this money make me happier than Arby’s curly fries or a McChicken from McDonald’s?

Also, I would have to lose the weight before they even considered me. There’s no telling if I’m sane enough to pass the psychological part of the evaluations, or if a couple would even want a loud child like me.

There are no huge health issues in my immediate family. Three out of my four grandparents are still alive. I’m naturally blonde and have a recessive gene for red hair, if that’s something prospective parents might be into. I am not too shabby of a singer and I graduated from college in three years. On paper my eggs might be enticing to someone who hasn’t heard my witch-like laughter.

So I guess in some ways it might be worth it, and time’s a-wasting; I am at prime egg-harvesting age. But I did eat left-over macaroni and cheese for breakfast this morning and I have no regrets about it all.

Whether I choose to remain my care-free self and eat all the roller-grill food from gas stations I want, or decide to purchase gently used exercise equipment on Craigslist, I am making a promise to myself to always put my happiness first.

We have such little time on this earth, we might as well spend our time here doing what makes us happy, whatever that might be.