Foster-Wheeler

I believe that any situation is made better by knowing someone is in your corner. I had to learn this the hard way. My sophomore year of high school was by far one of the worst years of my life. I was always tired, never trusted anyone, and lost sight of my priorities. My grades were also the worst they’ve ever been. I felt like nobody understood me and I didn’t understand how to ask for help. My parents were on me about my grades and I felt like they continually badgered me to do better. The more pressure they put on me, the harder it was for me to care. Because I associated asking for help with weakness, I spent months feeling frustrated and alone.

I wasn’t sure why I couldn’t make the changes I needed to make because I knew in my core I was better than the person I had let myself become. One night I had a long talk with my mom. I shared some of my feelings and frustrations with her. My mom shared some powerful advice with me. She told me to never bottle up my emotions. She was right. It seemed the more I bottled up my feelings, the more intense they became until I couldn’t even recognize them anymore. I began to understand that a part of what was missing was my mom. She is a single mom. She was working a full time job in Dayton- third shift and was also going to nursing school. It was difficult to find time to spend together. After our talk, my mom asked less about my grades and more about whether or not I was OK. After opening up to her, I found the motivation to take care of my business at school and pulled all of my grades up to As and Bs. I have carried those grades through junior year and senior year. I finished my first semester with a 4.0 GPA.

What I learned during this time was that while I was struggling, my family was struggling too. They didn’t know how to help me find my way because I wasn’t willing to open up. However, once I did ask for help, my mom and sisters moved mountains to make sure I had the support I needed. Both of my sisters are older and were in college. Sometimes they would organize times for both of them and my mom, and me to visit via group Facetime. They would send encouraging text messages. We would all share a little bit about what was going on in our lives including experiences and advice. Being able to see that my sisters had troubles too and they came through them encouraged me to keep working on myself. Watching my mom tackle a full time job and nursing school also inspired me to become the best version of myself.

My mom graduated from nursing school in December of 2020. My sisters still check in with me all the time. I am a senior and everyone is asking, “where do you plan on going to school?” or “what do you want to study after graduation?” I can feel the pressure building and the frustration with the unknown growing. But, now I know how to fix it. I’m glad I have learned how to reach out for help and talk about my feelings. Just a few months ago I had no idea what I wanted to do after high school. I started talking to my family and told them I wanted to get a job after basketball season and start looking into my options for college. I talked to my school counselor and made a plan. I believe that asking for help when I need it has made all the difference.